When love and destiny collide

Have you ever done loving someone yet destiny won't allow you to love him/her further?

February, a month of love. I thought that it would be easy to love someone you don't love at the very first place during this month. But i realize, it is not as easy as you thought. Everything started with disaster. Not the disaster like earthquakes or angry or whatsoever. I mean for a "disaster" is the disaster in my mind.

I was very confused that time, that day. I lost my friends for a certain reason that i could not afford to lose the love of my life at that time. Very happy, back then. But there is something that no one knows except me and some of my friends---i still love the person i live for for almost  five years. Yes, i really do. And that is the most stupid thing I done, loving both of them without my "present love" knowing it. And then, there is another thing, I told my past love that i love my present even it is not true. I just like this so called "present" of mine.

I thought that it would be easy to do this thing. Letting some of my friends know that i already moved on from my past. I tried to do it for almost a month, the month of love. However, just days ago, i realized that it is not that easy. Because, until now, there is only the "person of my past" in my heart and mind.

When love and destiny collides. I like the present love of mine. But there is something that the destiny always do. the destiny always makes a way for me to be away from him. At first i thought that it was just a coincidence, but I was wrong. Everything happened with a purpose. A purpose that i must not be with him.

It was back then, December 26, 2010, When I tried to be happy with this "present love" but i was not able to do so because "past love" is calling for my attention. Then, month of January when i ask "past love" if i could be happy with "present love". He said, "why not?" So, to think over and over again, I tried to move on and be with "present love" But then, the destiny won't let me. There is something that always keep me away from him. Just like my school works and friends. I could not leave these behind just to be with him. Second thing is that there is always something or someone that keep me in touch with "past love". These things that could not be avoided. I tried to...but the destiny never let me to. 

Because of these things, there is no more reason to stay with him (present love). I don't wanna be unfair with him.

The month of love started well but ended with disaster. 

A farewell to my love. That's the only thing i could say.